Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize