Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
