hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
