false alarm. still invincible.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
