weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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