Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
