I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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