Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
