What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I touched a dick in church today
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
