No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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