I CAN MOONWALK!
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
