I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
