He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
