its not stalking. its research.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
