Your face is a jimmy john
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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