Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
