Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
When did angry sex become our thing?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
