i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Dick very happy bro
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