i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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