i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
