physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
