dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
