I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
