My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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