I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
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