I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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