My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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