He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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