Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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