Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
