summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize