My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
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