This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
