Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize