just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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