yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
There's even glitter on my cock...
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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