A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
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