u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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