is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
