Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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