my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
stop calling my apartment porn island.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I believe in your delicious
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
