Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
