Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
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