K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize