KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
