What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You are a genius and a whore.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
