you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
