last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
My penis needs a shock collar
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
