Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
My breath smells like gin and sadness
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
