we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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