You're my little dorito
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
