Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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